It is Sunday, October 15, 2023 and I am

waking up in my bedroom in a Dutch city.

Autumn is one of my favourite seasons; the

crisp mornings, colourful trees and drinking

hot tea that warms your belly after a stroll

through the cold forest. I am putting on a

jumper, boots and a jacket to leave the house

and to breathe in the autumn air. I open the

front door and a warm stream of air that

feels like the blow dryer I sometimes use to

dry my hair, hits my face. The sun shines in

my eyes, a small girl in a blue dress and a

boy in a red T-shirt are running on the street,

playing. I turn around, go back inside, take

off my jacket and change into a T-shirt that

I had packed away, together with my other

summer clothes beneath my bed. Once I

am back outside, I continue my walk. My

neighbour across the street greets me: “It’s

a beautiful day, isn’t it?”. I smile and agree,

then I continue walking while the children

around me are playing. Everyone seems

happy. Then my eyes catch the trees at the

end of the road. Usually strong, tall and

green I can’t help but think that they look

different. The leaves are turning a different

colour, but it’s not the yellow that I remember

from my childhood autumns, when I was

playing hide and seek behind them. They are

dry. Curling up. The whole tree looks thirsty.

Another person is greeting me, saying “what

a beautiful day”. I smile back, but this time

it takes more effort to curl my mouth into a

smile. 

I turn right at the corner and sit down at a

little café. While I look at the menu, I notice

two girls next to me. They are talking about

their latest shopping haul and the latest

trends. On the ground below their table, I see

countless plastic shopping bags, containing

too many clothes to ever wear. Ready to

f ill a wardrobe full of ‘nothing to wear’s’,

just like mine. They are talking about f lying

to London for the weekend. I take out my

phone and open a social media app. Forest

f ires in California and Canada. I scroll down.

Flooding in Eastern Europe. I scroll down. An

advertisement of a huge company promoting

their supposed environmental efforts. I put

my phone down. The sun is burning on my

forehead like f lames licking my skin. Then I

hear the voice of the little girl with the blue

dress, who was playing on my street before:

“My dad says you can’t wait for a prince to

come save you, you have to be your own

hero”, she announces proudly to the boy next

to her. The words echo within me. A waiter

approaches my table and beams at me: “It’s

a beautiful day, isn’t it?” This time, I can’t

smile back. 

Insa Duvos

Insa Duvos is an Outgoing Exchange Off icer

at the VU Amsterdam where she enables

students to study abroad and to grow their

intercultural competences Next to her work

within the International Off ice she is also

part of the VU Green Ambassadors a group

within the university that is focusing on

making the institution more sustainable

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Insa

Duvos